I didn't meet Todd until the 3rd grade when we moved across town and across the alley from the Gaudreaus. One thing that didn't change throughout his life was how he welcomed new people. For the next 5 years, we were best friends. I don't know how many days we spent out at their cabin, or sleeping over in his basement, or sneaking peeks of his big brothers' Playboys under the mattress, or roaming downtown at Ben Franklin, trudging through the snow to the Old Armory to play basketball in the biting cold Saturday mornings and the other way to the outdoor pool at Harmon every day in the summer...but there's no doubt that my own formative years were influenced by his genteel nature. I could never figure out his proclivity for muscle mags...maybe because he was (very past tense) a little wimpy back then, but I'm sure it wasn't long after high school that he put that behind him for good.  I would go with him selling his Grit newspaper/magazine for a 35 cents around the neighborhood and he'd come with me on my paper route (I delivered to his house), and I have no idea what we used that money for -- was it all on candy? We'd head over to help Larrty out at the carwash, and spent hours sitting 65 feet up the pine tree next door where we could survey the whole Basin, two short twerps safe from the big, bad world. Later when we climbed the huge light towers down by the tracks, his doleful tears saved us from getting in trouble from the station workers when the ordered us down, and from the security guard when we were rooting around the Gibson's construction site before it was Pamida before it was some recreation/rehab center(?) and from two big-kid asshole bullies who cornered us down by the Heddrich's building. I remember some rare times when he'd try to be angry at someone or something. It was like he couldn't do it! He'd put on a face that was clearly an imitation of what he thought an angry person should look like. He couldn't mask his natural goodness.

Even though we had (mostly) different interests in high school, we still hung out sometimes and when I'd come home from college, he was usually the first person I'd track down and we'd catch up. When the Navy took me out here to California, we didn't communicate much except when I was back in Williston for the holidays, and I didn't see him after my folks moved out to GF.  When facebook became a thing, we'd send our greetings and he'd keep me updated about our friends who died, and I'd send him updates about my mundane life out here. I loved seeing his ridiculous (but interesting) oilfield videos. Seeing his omnipresent goofy smile and perpetual great attitude would put an equally goofy smile on my own face.  David (Everson) -- that's what we called him back then -- lived down the street and we played with him in grade school sometimes, and when he died I felt it. But I'm sure Todd and I went months at a time seeing each other every day, and with the exception of good Navy friend of mine, I've been fortunate enough to not have lost a real best friend. Until now. I reached out when I was in GF in August (I thought he'd be heading through on his way home from his treatment in MN) but it didn't work out.  Ouch. I'm glad that I at least let him know recently how much I've valued our friendship.

Say what you want about facebook, but it keeps me close to the far away people, and brings to mind the  precious times we've been together. Having a childhood friend like Todd was a gift. I envy those of you who were able to get close as an adult. Reading these posts, I know he gave a lot of happiness and comfort to a lot of people by just being his wonderful kind self. Is there better legacy than that? Todd, you've lived a great life and I'm filled with gratitude having known you.

Kavanaugh Not Right for the Court

1. Non Judicial: His partisan rant was enough. Someone who talks like that, thinks like that (revenge, avenge, blame, seeing only half the story), not judge material, definitely not Supreme Court Material.

2. Mean drunk: Never blacked out? Right. Doesn't entertain the possibility of blacking out.  Nope. Full of shit. Not the sort of brain we need on the Supreme Court.

3. Compromised: I believe he did it, and therefore would is psychically beholden to that subconscious experience.

That's way more than enough for me to believe they need to find someone else.

I'm wholly galled by the outrage the Republicans are expressing for the Democrats, who are using this accusation as a political tool. I am outraged at the Democrats, too.  But after what the Republicans pulled on Merritt's nomination, for THEM to be outraged when they did something way worse, fuck that shit. Based on who you are, GOP, the correct response is "Touche."


I kind of think that the humans who are charged with making the wisest decisions for the complex world of national government should be able to see past their own small lives. They should be anchored outside a narrow, parochial partisan viewpoint. They should be confident in the arc of their lives and understand how politics will wreak havoc, not act with the outrage expected from an ingenue to the world of public life. To feign indignation or to actually be indignant to a reaction the reality of your history is an accurate portrayal of your character. Either you're too naive to hold the position, or you're deceptive, in which case you don't deserve the position. "Hey, he's human. He should be able to get mad..." Shut up. You're being entrusted with the most important job in the country. You need to be more than just another human. You need to be an exceptionally wise human with an exceptionally broad and deep understanding of the human condition since that's what you'll be judging. You can't be tossed around by the ridiculous political whims of a dysfunctional congress, for God's sake. You're supposed to be the check and balance! Not the motherfucking arena punchers. If you want to do and be that, then run for congress. Don't accept the nomination for Supreme Court. You could have held steadfast in your convictions without lowering yourself to the ridiculous stance of shrill conspiracy theorist. Seriously, dude. Have a modicum of perspective.

I don't care if he was hurt, angry, scared. A SCJ should be able to control their ire enough to refrain from a partisan rant. This was the best we had? I don't think so. And, no, I'm not a democrat or liberal. Low point, hollow "win". Up your game, GOP - this is an embarrassment. Yes, Dems share the blame. But integrity still matters to some of us. Not to Kavanaugh in so many ways. Our fathers told us taking the easy way out was not the best course of action. And here is a prime example of doing just that. Take the extra time to find a full-on winner. Not a frat-boy patsy. Like Trump, it's not the democrats that bring him down. It's his own damn stupidity -- Kavanaugh less stupid, but similarly an "emotional intelligence moron".

Atonement

When a culture has lived in a state of sin and has caused huge damage, there is no easy way out. It will never be forgotten and it will continue to undermine societal health until it is fully and overtly atone for. Two obvious examples are slavery and misogyny. For our hundreds of years of enslaving a people and for our history back to the stone age of mistreating women (through rape, murder, oppression, discrimination), it will eat us until we come clean and pay for it in a way that actually heals. There is no "getting over it." Some things you don't get over. I can imagine being raped is one of them. Being denigrated as a slave. Losing a child in a tragic, needless accident or through violent and torturous crime. None of these are "get over it-able." It will continue to erode our collective self esteem until we make up for it in as many possible ways that there are to do so. Until then, don't get over it. That's a fallacious admonition and the person who makes it doesn't understand how life works.

Making Capitalism Viable Long Term

One of the proven outcomes of capitalism is its tendency to increasingly polarize the powerful and weak. Over the long term, the effect destabilizes an economy, weakening it overall, or worse, leads to a breakdown of society.

The reasons are undisputed: the rich and powerful (by definition) wield influence (economic, media, governmental and political). That influence improves their standing at the expense of labor.

For long term strength and growth, policies that ensure labor shares in the economic growth (powering markets by strengthening the buying power of the middle and lower classes) and decrease income inequality will increase the health of the society.

With the historic record of companies driving down salaries for the lowest workers, what can be done to:

• incentivize companies to increase compensation for lower-wage workers, 
• keep employment high and employees striving to achieve,
• reduce those on public welfare, 
• maintain a viable safety net, and
• sustain the innovative an entrepreneurial spirit where capitalism excels?

Obviously, any policies that continue to oppress any group of people, making them less able to participate in the fruits of American prosperity are toxic to universal pursuit of happiness, so anything that doesn't work to root out and destroy institutional racism, sexism, and other isms weakens our country.  Any policy that increases income inequality weakens us.  

Fragility

There's a certain genetic component in personality that contributes to a thick or thin skin, but how does a person become fragile or resilient (gritty), and what is a good strategy for parents and schools to foster empathy and the ability to understand another's situation while strengthening their own ability to transcend hardships?

I bet one is to call out or even create activities that naturally result in teachable moments to stop and reflect on different ways to approach the current struggle.

There is a component of being able to step outside one's self and see the perspective of live as it's lived from outside the present moment. That takes practice and someone to help get started.

I believe these things...

• Maximized individual freedom.
• Corrupt government is worth fighting.
• Government has a role in modern life, but it has to be trusted, so every bit of corruption needs to be highlighted and eliminated to the maximum extent possible.
• A non-partisan free press is important to identify and publish abuse of power and needs to be supported.
• Collective security requires people to feel secure, which means an effective law enforcement,, which means law enforcement must be trusted which means law enforcement must be trustworthy which means they need to be policed and monitored closely from inside and outside their ranks for their own effectiveness and safety.
• Prisons and schools need to be public enterprises, No private prisons and no privatized "public" schools. No PROFITEERING from incarceration! If we're going to lock people up for our own good and for their own good, we need to all pay for it directly with taxes.
• The goal of incarceration should be rehabilitation, not punishment. As long as it takes to allow someone to become an effective contributor to society. That doesn't mean people responsible for certain crimes (sexual assault or murder) should ever be free to roam the streets on their own, but within their incarceration, they can work and contribute to atone for their harm against society from their safe lockdown.
• Equity of education until adulthood is for the common good. That means it will require more resources to educate poor communities, and so be it. We need to pay it. Once we're adults, then, it's on the individual, but they have to be educated about the tools to help define and strive for their own success in their own callings or desires.

Your View of America Is Legitimate

From the front porch of every life, there is a different perspective of our country. One thing about America is you get to have your view. If you believe you're perspective is legit, then you need to acknowledge that everyone else's view is as legitimate as yours.  Let's engage in a little whatboutism.

What about people who have lived in many places and seen many sides of this great nation. Is their perspective more legitimate? No.

What about people who have friends in many different interest groups and ethnic groups and races and classes. Surely they would have a more important view of America, wouldn't they? No.

What about a person who has lived in a small community of like minded and like colored people their whole lives? Wouldn't their perspective be less important than mine? No.

What about gullible people who believe in the most exciting conspiracy theories they can find on the internet that let them feel like their special knowledge (for having read it on the internet and SEEN the contrails with their own eyes)? Wouldn't their paranoid and outlandish ideas make their opinion about their idea of America compromise their view of America? Yes, but no, they are fully entitled to their legitimate view of America.

How about someone with traumatic brain injury who has a much compromised ability to take in information about their surroundings? Yes, their own perspective is legitimate to them as yours is to you.

When you denigrate someone for believing in the most accurate picture of America as their minds can conjure, you are being unAmerican. 

If you want to change someone's mind, you have got to do the work. Get the story out in a way someone without your superior vision can understand and will then want to change their mind to agree more with yours. 

Dog Names

My former boss/man-ager was in touch lately and asked if I was interested in helping dub her next piece of puppy.  Brainstorming... This old brain ain't nearly as rubbery as it was, so we'll see -- I'll try to limber up...[cracking my metaphorical (brain) knuckles <snap! snap! crack!>]

Ken and Anne Shapazian. The dog is a Cheyenne, Cayenne, he looks shy, your name's Anne, but you mentioned he looks a little reddish, there's the Cayenne like the pepper, Cay (rhymes with sky) for short.  Cheyenne Wyoming always makes me think of that color.  And my daughter's name is Shion (pronounced she-OWN, but my mom called her SHY-on before she heard it spoken -- a hundred times), Those are both gender neutral. The color of tanned leather (Tanner) but browner and redder, Tan-lea (which means "so read" in Spanish and which is phonetically "so red" like, she's brown, but such a reddish brown that she's so red for being brown).  Curly Sienna, her actual color (as my eye sees it and brain knows it) is a sienna. Sienna, which I've been to, which I love and have amazing memories of (probably better memories than the actual experience, but that's one of the benefits of a healthy imagination -- your memories are MORE than reality, providing you're erroring on the side of better and not worse).  Si-enna, See-enna or Sigh-enna. Sigh -- puppies make you sigh from time to time.

Half way between Newfoundland and Germany (the breeding grounds for the Labrador and Poodle, respectively), is the North Atlantic between Iceland and Greenland. NORTHATLANTIC. That's CITNALTAHTRON (sitnaltatron) spelled backward which would be an apt name for a robot in Sanskrit, but not so much a furry friend. The middle four letters are alta. Well, that took me nowhere. Alta evokes the snow-capped peaks of the Alps, which is nice (though not necessarily meaningful to the breed), and I imagine calling for your lost dog "Alta!" which could be Ul-tuh or Al-ta (rhumes with pal-ta).  If you were a Chargers fan, the middle two letters are LT (for Ladanian Tomlinson) which would definitely have good vibes and connotations for you.  And a fair name for a pooch.

You're French, Mercier, and La-Poo as in L'peu (means "the little" in English according to Google Translate - always). or L'pu which means "the able" or L'peau - "the skin"? 

In homage to Guiness, the color is closer to a Porter or Dunkel. Porter is more dignified, but Dunkel is more Fun-kel. And if it's a male and he breeds, he could become Uncle Dunkel.

OK, so that's a little for this evening.  If that gives you some thought, send them back to me and I'll chew on those for awhile. Which reminds me of when Guiness(?) ate your diningroom furniture. Or parts thereof.

For The Good Of The Republic

Every person in prison, every person marginalized, trivialized, left behind, suboptimized, disenfranchised, underutilized, disengaged, distracted from, and otherwise lessened weakens our great nation.

There's are some societies around the world with a lot less diversity (racial, religious, ethnicity) and a lot more cultural cohesion (Japan and Korea, Scandinavia), and they reap some of the advantages. They have their own problems, to be sure, but their countries work more like "well-run machines" than does ours. 

America, on the other hand, is way more diverse, and we are anything but culturally coherent these days.  But there are certain things about America which have powered our excellence, and diversity, our independence, our entrepreneurial spirit and fearlessness (in business, et al.) which have worked to our distinct and spectacular advantages for a century and more.  Every silver lining has a dark side, and the dark sides of those positive attributes have been an indisputable drag on what could have been an even more productive and satisfying epoch.

You want to supercharge the full economy? You want to energize the masses?  You want to help America reach its potential?  Then you have to fight for a system that makes every person believe they are in this together, that every person is inherently worthwhile and will reap a fair benefit for their hard work and willingness to step up and take a risk.  That means fighting against every form of discrimination, from the blatant racism to more subtle institutional (both intentional and unintentional) racism, sexism and harassment, religions and all-gender discrimination, agism, etc.  Whose a better part of your work team: Someone being belittled or criticized for their sexual orientation, or that same person surrounded by people accept and support who they are?  Who's going to try harder to make it to work when things get tough: someone who is payed a living wage with medical benefits, or someone who is being shortchanged because they're women?

I struggle with many union policies and mindsets, but when I think of how the rich and powerful take advantage of the workforce, and when you can just look at the way wages have fallen compared to management and C-suite compensation, I see how critical they are to the strength of our economy.  Left to their own devices, the economical forces will continue to widen inequality weakening middle class, and creating a very desperate lower class, which is a cancer to the health of a nation.  Not cool at all.

Is it obvious? The health of our democracy is fully dependent on leaders at all levels working constantly to fight anything that defines others as less, that perpetuates a widening wealth inequality, or makes puts up barriers to someone striving to do their best.  No doubt, hard work must be rewarded and sloth should be punished, but an unfiltered look are reality makes it clear that we are far from optimum.  This will take major work on many fronts from education to social policy to market incentives to financial regulation reform, but if everyone picks part of the problem near and dear to themselves to help improve, it is not (yet) beyond us.